Do you have a failure to communicate with others? You can make yourself stand out from the crowd by having full command over issues in your area of expertise. No doubt, you must also communicate with other people in the domain of your work about your learning. You will come across many people in your life who were masters in their field, but do you know anyone who has mastery in sharing his learnings?
Have you ever met a person who is less than a great communicator? He even doesn’t realize that he is having the problem of not being a great communicator. A software engineer can fill up a blackboard with different queries about his project, & he does not expect all his listeners to know what it means. For some people, it may be everything & for some, it might mean nothing.
We should focus on assessing our ability to communicate. How can we enhance it? Being a person with the highest IQ level does not mean that others are understanding you are intellectual. If everyone understands you, then you must be unforgettable in your society.
Let’s explore this with some questions & ideas for your help.
The best way to know that people around you enjoy your company is by knowing the fact that do you enjoy their company? This question will give you a deep insight into yourself.
Marlon Brando, a Hollywood actor, was asked that does he think himself the best actor in the industry. This was a very treacherous question. But the answer to Brando was very full of creativity.
Marlon answered by saying that it does not matter whether he is the best actor. Adding to his answer he said, he is the best-positioned actor. People know him and they enjoy his company. He said that he makes the life of the people around him interesting.
According to him, it was fun for both him and the people around him. He replied that he is not always a nice guy, but he is never the same guy twice. It was just because of his communication and personality that people love his movies and the public wants to see him around.
Do you think that you are like Brando in this respect? Do you do get together with your friends & colleagues even if you are busy and you don’t have to? If your answer comes in yes, then you are on the right track. And if your answer comes in no, then ask yourself, whom would you rather be with? In the second situation, you should make a career move in another direction.
Have you ever communicated with your colleagues by phone, e-mail, or in person even when it’s not necessary? Or you feel more comfortable being alone.
The best personality who was challenged in this area was probably Howard Hughes. He was a great technical expertise, and undoubtedly a genius. He could design an airplane, could fly it, and he could also direct a movie about it. But when it comes to communication with his employees, it was very difficult for him to connect with them personally.
Once Hughes interviewed a candidate who applied for an engineering job in his company. When the interview finished, Hughes said to the candidate that he didn’t think him to be a suited person as an engineer. But he could arrange another job for him which might also be interesting for him. That job was much simpler than that of an engineer but the pay was the same.
The candidate had just to sit in a hotel suite from 9 to 5 each day. His job was to answer the phone on the first ring. No information had to be provided to the person who did call, even no questions could be asked from the caller. The duty was to just answer the phone on the first call.
That candidate took the job and he spent three weeks in a hotel room. The man quit the job after three weeks as the telephone never rang during this tenure.
It is very essential that you assign any assignment to anyone with a clear purpose and rationale about it. This does not mean that if the purpose is clear to you it would also be clear to others to whom you are allocating this assignment. Make it clear to them also. If you can’t make it clear to others, then it’s better that you have as much money as Howard Hughes. Because by this your career prospects may be severely limited.
You should always remember some of the following points:
1- In case of difference of opinion with others, do you always feel that you need to win? If you think so, you should choose words carefully during your conversation.
2- A person’s self-expression is remembered by others even if he has forgotten.
3- Do not instinctively take the side of a person if he is targeting another due to some anger.
4- Never take the seat of judgment if someone is available for it.
5- There’s a wise option of not involving in a matter if you don’t have to.
6- Always make yourself a stand-out manager or employee, which means walking a fine line.
7- To be sociable is great, but it’s not great to be only sociable and nothing more.
8- It’s good to circulate within the culture of an organization, but it’s not to hang around the watercooler.
The actress Sally Field, after accepting an Academy Award, said, “You really like me!”. By saying this, she actually highlighted an issue that most people share. Many types of research show that when people meet someone for the first time, three points come in their mind.
Assessment about Intelligence:
They make the assessment of a newcomer’s intelligence & education. He questions himself about the intellectuality of others. Does he ask himself that are we on radically different levels? Is he below my level or am I intimated by the total Einstein of that person? Most people are uncomfortable with geniuses. They try to avoid these intellectuals.
Assessment about Finance:
The second judgment which we make about a newcomer is about his finances. Is he rich or poor? Does he use a credit card or debit card to buy groceries? This should not be a parameter to judge anyone. As with intelligence, it’s hard for us to judge finance. Sometimes he may be under financial stress, and it actually can be frightening to many people. The finance point should not be a separation point from anyone.
Assessment about Friendship:
Unlike the first 2 steps, the third point is definitely important. People always wonder about others, whether they can be good friends of yours. It doesn’t matter whether you help them to get ahead, but the main point is whether you could be their friends.
Humans want more than anything else from a new acquaintance. Dale Carnegie was one of the pioneers to elaborate on it.
It’s actually hard to explain how to provoke friendship in others. The most important element may be in making yourself stand out from the crowd of people. To reveal the secret of friendship, there are four short principles. These short principles will help you to be successful. You should always keep these points in your mind.
You should take a genuine interest in others. Show others that you actually take interest in their lives. You yourself may be totally captivating but this doesn’t mean that you are the only one who is totally fascinating. Don’t fake your genuine interest.
Always try to remember the name of the person. The most important word in any language of the world is remembering someone’s name. By this, they feel that they are important to others.
Importance in Community:
Make them feel that they are important to you and your community. Do it sincerely.
Most importantly smile during your conversation with others.
There is an ancient proverb, “Wisdom is the power to learn something from everyone”. If you want that you become unforgettable, you want to be wise, want to do a class act, you should find an important thing which you can learn from only one person—the person you are talking to right now.